Alternatives to Spending $2 Million on Stillwater Bridge PR

MnDOT has decided to spend $2 million letting people know that there is going to be a new bridge between Stillwater and whatever’s across the river from Stillwater*.

While a person could ramble on about all of the other things that could be done with $2 million, let’s limit the scope to things that would actually increase use of the bridge. While it may be fun to tell people about a new bridge, the real objective is to get people to use it. Here are a few ideas:

1. $10,000 down payment assistance for the first 150 families to build 3+ garage homes on the Wisconsin side of the bridge. Must have at least two jobs in Minnesota to qualify. Total cost: $1.5 million.

2. $250,000 each for the first two Pizza farms on the Wisconsin side of the bridge. Total cost: $500,000.

3. Get serious about Sunday Sales liquor laws in Minnesota. Legalize Sunday Sales, but ban liquor store sales Monday through Saturday. Total cost: Nothing, since people will simply plan to buy all of their alcohol on Sundays in Minnesota. I know this because that’s what people say to justify Sunday sales today.

PR schmee-R. Induce demand with cash money, pizza, and beer.

*My guess is property owned by Michele Bachmann.

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